Good enough

Do you ever feel like there is so much more you could or should be doing? That is how I have been feeling lately. The only thing is I have no motivation to change any of it. Motivation might not be the right word. I feel like who I am today is who I am for right now. I have no idea what the future holds or what might happen that might influence me as a person. I tend to think about the high school version of me and today's version. I am happy with who I am at this point.

Personality

HS - I was quit, awkward, shy, a people pleaser, a good kid. 

Now - I am more outspoken, independent, determined, outgoing, friendly. I stand up for myself.

Physical Appearance

HS - I want to completely for get my Freshman year. So I was lazy, had no interest in making myself presentable, cut all of my hair off, tried modeling, not confident in who I was.

Now - I am still lazy but working on it. I still don't consider myself a girly girl. I do wear more makeup and try and look presentable when I leave the house. I do feel more confident in who I am.

Love
HS - Hmmmm...I loved my parents and brothers as any teen does. I loved Caleb as much as my heart new to love.
Now - Every day I learn that love is different. Love is amazing and hard at the same time. Making sure that the people in my life know I love them. My love for Caleb is completely different now. I look at him in so many more ways and have found more ways to love him. I now have so much love for my son. I have no idea where my heart had more room to give but it feels great.

Overall
HS - There are a lot of things I would do differently if I could.
Now - I think that sometimes being an independent woman can be a good thing and a bad thing. I think as I have gotten older I have become more selfish and I can admit that. As I continue to grow and change I think I may hurt or let people down. I am sure I could be a beter person. There is a lot more I should be grateful for. I should do more service for others.  I should make more time for the people in my life. I should be a better friend. The thing is...at this point I am happy with who I am. I don't feel bad for the things I do or don't do. I am who I am and for now that is good enough.